Is being nervous hereditary?

September 1, 2011

This upcoming Wednesday marks the first day of three year old preschool. And although I have had my fair share of gripes about these last three weeks of no programming, it has been a lot of fun. Maybe it was because I set out for Mission Fun, or maybe it’s because my kids really are a blast.

This is clearly the epitome of fun.

Today we had Meet the Teacher at school. I have spent a lot of time in the last three weeks building up school. We have gotten new shoes, a new backpack and some great clothes to kick start the new school year. Despite everything there is still an overall tension in this household.

Last year we switched schools right before Gabby emerged into the world. It caused us a great deal of heartache just thinking about switching (read about it here) and then there were a whole new set of challenges once we got here (read about those here).

As this school year starts, Drew had to leave the comfort of the full day (daycare) program and switch over to the preschool (half day) program. With that comes a whole new set of kids and brand new teachers that he has never interacted with before. I realize that he’s only three and there is so much change that comes with life, it’s still hard to tackle these new changes.

So last night we really started talking about what this new school year will bring. How exciting it is to be making new friends. At one point his old teachers were new to him and he loved them so much, so he will definitely love these new teachers. Drew wasn’t buying into it, and he actually speaks English now so he was able to articulate it! He told me that he wasn’t excited, he was NERVOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Example one of many to come that I am ruining my child! Where does a three year old pick up the feelings of being nervous but from his very nervous mommy! I better secure therapy now!

And as we were driving to school this morning, he told me his tummy hurt! Needless to say, my tummy started hurting. The thought that my little precious three year old was having anxiety about going to school just killed me. I couldn’t have passed along my keen fashion sense or my witty sense of humor…I had to pass along my anxiety! I suppose it was inevitable since I come from a long line of worriers.

When we got there he was very clingy. We did a lap around the room, taking in all the cool new things. As time went on, I won’t go so far as to say he was enjoying himself, he found some toys of interest and did his own thing. I felt that it was as successful as it could be.

What happens on Wednesday? What happens when I go to drop him off, he falls apart, I fall apart and he decides he hates school? Aren’t I supposed to be immune to this by now? I have been dropping him off with caregivers since he was six months old. How do I stay composed when he is upset? How do I avoid him being upset? And how am I ever going to take him to college someday without severe sedation?

6 thoughts on “Is being nervous hereditary?

  1. Don’t be nervous! Kids pick up on our emotions better than we can. Keep talking about what he can expect at school, it will help him prepare. Read books with him abotu school. And take advatage of meeting the teacher and visiting the classroom. If possible, arrange for him to arrive and do one of his preferred activites. And be strong dropping him off!! If he is allowed, let him bring a comfort item from home! I know it is easy for me to tell you what to do. This coming from a mama who cried when her daughter did gymnastics on her onw the first time. I miss the mom and tot gymnastics. Good luck..he will love school before you know it!

    • Those are great suggestions! I especially like the comfort item. Good thinking!

      I totally get the apprehension about your kiddo graduating from mom and tot gymnastics. As parents we want them to grow up and become independent but each step stings.

      Thank you so much for contributing!

  2. Hey Heli.
    Here is something I adapted for Drew called a “social story.” I used it for all my kindergarten students this year. Feel free to adapt it, add pictures (just from google docs) or add to it. (obv print it out)
    Basically the point is to validate the kids’ feelings, and tell them what to do in the situation.

    Good luck. No offense, but usually parents are worse off than the kids. 🙂 The hardest part may be for YOU to walk away. 🙁

    Going to School: A true story, by DREW

    On Wednesday, I am going back to school!

    I am a little nervous. That’s ok. Lots of kids are nervous.

    At school, I can play with blocks. It will be fun!

    At school, I can play with trucks. Cool!

    At school, I can eat snack. Yum!

    I will see my friends at school. It will be fun to play with __________, ______________, and ________________.

    My teacher, Miss _________ is so nice. If I am nervous, she will give me a hug.

    At the end of the day, mommy will pick me up. Mommy will be so happy I had fun at school. We will call Daddy and daddy will be so proud I had fun at school!

    School is great!

  3. I am changing Jeremy to strictly pre-school also. We really should get together and compare notes.

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