In addition to it being my brother-in-law’s birthday yesterday (happy birthday Jeff!), it was also my youngest child’s eleven month birthday. I feel like I need to hold onto this last month of babyhood extra tight. After this, I no longer have a baby baby. I have a baby toddler. And that era, the era of babies is over. This shop is closed. A little tear comes.
I frequently tell Drew to stop growing up so fast (WHAT?! I actually want to marinate in this crazy life longer than I have to?!?!). Recently he has been asking me why I want him to be a baby. I tell him about how I loved being able to pick him up and hold him close. He offers up the same opportunity although I can barely lift him, his legs span to my knees and it’s far less graceful than it once was. I tell him about how there was something so nice about his whole life being with me (and then I remember those horrible feelings of leaving him with daycare providers, coupled with the smile I get when I think about how much I loved my professional job – I digress).
Now I have been focusing on what I love about him as a big boy. I love that he can unbuckle himself from his car seat in the WAY back of my sweet ride. I love that he can get dressed by himself in the morning, put on his shoes and zip up his coat. I love all the great questions he poses and how he’s getting so interested in life in a real way. I also love that his comprehension isn’t deep enough so he is satisfied by mommy and daddy’s love planted a baby in mommy’s tummy…phew!!!
As I pack up baby stuff and enter this phase of life without a baby (other than the one I’ve currently got that has two teeth to date!!) or a baby on the horizon, I embrace it. I’m giving up a little, snuggles and dependency, but I’m getting so much more!! It’s only the tip of the iceberg for my Drew experience and then there’s two more after that! I guess that’s why I had three…I knew their had to be a reason 😉