Swimming pools petrify me. They scare me in a way that I don’t ever know how I will send my children to camps where they are able to swim where only paid professionals are watching them. I have always been a camp person, an advocate for children going to camp. But the thought of swim lessons or, dare I say, free swim at camp scares me to the point of never signing them up.
The other day I was at a concert in the park where the park district camp attended. At one point a variety of kids went to the playground with some counselors while other counselors stayed back at that concert with other children. At no point did I see either counselor take tally over who was responsible for which kids. I am not blaming it on the camp or the counselors, perhaps it was an appropriate amount of supervision for the age. I am not debating that.
The trouble I have is that the mere thought of giving anyone else the complete and total supervision of my children gives me anxiety. The thought that my child, who has a proven track record of not listening to supervisors, would be bouncing back and forth between concert and playground (or worse venturing out to the parking lot or street) makes me want to put him in a bubble.
So I realize this is a part of a larger problem. I am a worry wart. And it’s not that I haven’t accepted that something bad could happen to my most prized possessions under my own watch, but it seems like there are more things that I can control. Until their is a rationale for why bad things happen to good people, I’m not sure I can ever lose this constant concern.
I have mentioned my doubts about having a third, like I’m pushing my luck. Those same doubts hold true to just enjoying my kids. Is it possible for anyone to have such great kids and the other shoe never drop? Is it possible that anyone can go through life scott free? And better yet – if the shoe never has to drop, can you let me know soon so that I can lose some of this constant worry?
Someday in the not to distant future, I’m going to have to let my kids go to camps with pools and go on field trips. Someday I’m going to have to accept that they can’t live in a bubble. The question is how do I get to that point? And how do I live with myself when I’m there without being racked with anxiety? My kids are going to love me when I go off to college with them, don’t you think?
I'm a mother, wife, daughter, and friend. Until recently I was also an employee. Now that I'm a full time mom, I've decided to make my thoughts, concerns and feelings public.
The best thing you can do is the opposite of keep them in a bubble – it’s to teach them.
When you cross a road, show them HOW you do it. Tell them they are not allowed to do it for themselves yet, but show them the skills.
Be cautious of pools, of course, but the best thing you can do is getting them in swimming lessons. And don’t show them fear of the water, because if they ever did get into trouble, they may panic.
At some point you have to trust them to know what to do. And that’s only possible if they have been taught, not had everything done for them.
Everytime you use a safely skill, narrate it. ‘Now kids, this is a busy road. So we must stop at the curb. Look both ways. Look again. Cross’. And so on. Make it second nature.
my honest answer recently posted..Why Shouldn’t I Kill Myself?
What a great, honest answer 🙂 Seriously though, I think the job of the parent is to give their kids the skills to survive and thrive on their own. If I keep my kids in a bubble, I will not have done my job as a parent 🙁