Win For Mommy!

Blogging is definitely therapy for me. Just unloading all the words alleviates some of the stress I go through. Yesterday could have been a very expensive therapy session. Rather I unloaded my frustrations on you, my readers. I sincerely appreciate all the people that reached out to me with kind words, suggestions and resources.

When the first “ding” from my phone came through, I nervously braced myself. I realized that I left myself so exposed. I left myself vulnerable to being judged. For my parenting to come into question. I left my child out there for my online world to think about his challenges, diagnose his behavior and think twice about his personality. And although I realize by blogging, advertising on social media venues, and sharing my thoughts with everyone I’m always putting us out there to be judged. This time I felt more sensitive to what that would mean.

I’m glad I discussed it because I got a lot of great feedback and it made me feel less alone. But I also feel insecure that I exposed some of the raw, tender feelings I have to parenting. I was one of those kids that always wanted to be a mom. There was no question that I was put on this earth to have kids. And now that I’m doing it, I realize that it’s a lot harder than I thought. And as many people as I talk to, I’m not sure anyone really makes it sound as hard as it can be.

So maybe I did what other people yearn to do. Maybe I put it all on the table in a way that most people don’t. Or maybe I talked about the family secret that nobody ever wants mentioned. Or maybe I’m completely on this desert island with a madman and none of you readers really understand what it’s like. Either way, it needed to be said.

You’ll be happy to know that we have had a great day today. First of all, I started the day off with coffee. I felt that life is too crazy to start giving up a bad habit, I’m going to hold onto that vice for awhile. Secondly, Drew had school today and we are finally starting to get into a routine with that. The forgotten one, a.k.a. Gabby, had a music class where I was able to engage with her and socialize (two things mommy really likes). And the biggest reason is that Drew has been listening so well today!

He may be listening because he knows he was skating on thin ice. He may also be listening because I’m keeping him on a leash so tight (this is figuratively of course) that there’s no wiggle room. Or it might be because I stepped up my discipling game and he’s realizing I mean business! Either way, I’m celebrating success today. And as far as I’m concerned, gotta count the wins when you get them!