My New Friend

June 3, 2013

To the lady who was described as having out of control kids that she cannot handle, I salute you.

There’s either two ways she lives with her current situation; she is giving her kids all she has and still can’t seem to grasp her unruly children or she is at a place where she is content with the way things are.

Speaking as a mom of completely unruly children, I literally don’t know what else to do. I don’t know what will make my eldest a better sport and stop him from chest bumping the child who scored the goal that he was “intended” to score. I don’t know how to stop my middle child from pulling a chair out from under an unsuspecting child because that was where she wanted to sit. And I certainly don’t know how to calm down my screaming child at the restaurant that my family chose that is completely not “child friendly.”

If my “friend” here that has out of control kids is up against what I am, I understand how very hard it can be. I understand how embarrassing it is when your kids don’t behave the way you’d like them to. I understand how many headaches you have had trying to not let incidents ruin what has been explained by so many as the best days of parenthood. I understand how exhausted you are at the end of the day from failing to keep them under control.

If my “friend” has given up trying and has found the inner strength to let them be the maniacs that they so clearly want to be without affecting her, I am impressed. In a world of judgmental glares, rude comments and over zealous parents that she has found a place to say forget it all, I say good for you!

I would be a better parent, a better spouse and a better person to be around if I could stop sweating so very many of these details. And the times I have nothing left to give to the discipline game, I wouldn’t feel so insecure at how I’m being perceived. I could let go of my children’s out of control behavior being a reflection of the kind of person I am, if I just let them run wild and didn’t care so very much.

I’m so very sorry for my “friend” that someone described her as having out of control children that she does nothing to help. I’m sorry for her because I understand her plight. Whether she is giving it all she’s got or she’s let it all go, I’m sure she thinks she’s doing the best she can. Raising kids is not easy. And maybe someday her out of control children will discover the cure for cancer or something. In which case, these mothers that judged her will feel really silly…don’t ya think?

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