If I had anything left before, it’s official I have lost it. Awhile ago I may have said that I am losing it. Well, it’s gone…long gone as far as I’m concerned. And there’s no sign that it will ever come back. Everyone, mostly myself, is going to have to just accept that I may never again have my act together.
Today in Tot Shabbat the teacher mentioned keeping all the kids on their laps, having the older children come by us instead of letting the younger ones run after the older ones, etc. They were working on trying to get better control of the joint school Shabbat. And all I could say or do is throw up my arms. Why? Because I’m rebellious and refuse to help out the teachers to get control of Shabbat. Nah. Rather, the assylum has been taken over. I no longer have any control because I am out numbered!
I missed kindergarten registration. How is that possible? Months ago I was scouring the website to make sure that my pregnancy brain (which seems like a sharp mental capacity at this point) wouldn’t miss it. It’s not like a monumentally large happening in our household or anything! Drew’s gonna be enrolled in school, that or JV after all. They can’t exactly turn me away. But when did I get so absentminded that I could forget something like that?!?
Camp is on the horizon. In my craze of pregnancy, I made enrolling him a top priority…Go Mom! At 3:10 am, when Noah FINALLY fell asleep which entitled me to a solid two hours of slumber, I couldn’t sleep because I remembered THEN (of all times) I forgot the first payment due by January 25! It took me a month to realize I forgot the payment. WHAT?!?!
I don’t know this person I have become. I don’t recognize her. And as anal retentive as I may have been before, I miss that girl. This absentminded girl who is playing dodgeball to the countless curve balls that these little maniacs are throwing at me in a given day is not who I aspire to be. The worse part is I’m not even close to seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. At this point I may be wandering this tunnel for forty years like my ancestors. At least this tunnel has internet.