My Inner Yogi

Relaxation? Impossible! Inner peace? As likely as peace in the Middle East. Yoga? A nice workout after several days of hard muscular working out.

People that advocate for Yoga talk about the mental benefits as much as the physical ones. To be completely honest, I thought it was all a crock. I find it hard being alone with myself in any sort of spiritual way. It’s not that I don’t have a spiritual side, I just can’t seem to get myself to a place of peace. Maybe it’s the fact that I spend my life on fast forward, maybe it’s because I’m shallow, but whatever it is it seemed impossible for me.

I have recently been taking this yoga class on Fridays as a good way of breaking up my work outs and getting in some much needed stretches. And I’ve been enjoying more and more each week. Recently, however, it seems to calm me down in ways not many things do.

I’m impossible to watch television with because I multitask and then get lost in the story line. At times I have found massages stressful because they force me to focus on the craziness of my mind. My reasons for not running longer distances have been attributed to not wanting to be alone with myself for that long. Examples of my inability to properly de-stress are endless.

The concept of getting anything more out of a work out, than an actual workout, seemed ridiculous. The one week where the instructor started “ohmmmmmm”ing I thought that it was confirmed that I would never mentally go to the place that Yoga advocates go. The last couple of weeks, though, its taken me there.

The last 3-5 minutes of the workout are usually dedicated to laying (corpse like). I usually spend that time jumping out of my skin to get a move on it. Today I’d go so far as to say that I was stuck and wanted to stay in that position.

The instructor spends the last few seconds taking time to recognize our abilities, the opportunity to be here and appreciate our lives. I found myself giving a lot of “Amen Sista”s in my head. I was 100% wrapped up in the Yoga moment.

I couldn’t help but laugh at this week’s Modern Family where Claire, the tightly wound perfectionist and stay at home mother to three, pretends to go to Yoga for relaxation but instead goes to a firing range. She explains that her kids cause her a lot of frustration and she needs to get it out somehow. I may not need to fire a gun, just a little downward dog. Who would have thought?!?!

So although I found a way to nicely unwind, some things never really change. All my frustration came back shortly after trying to round up my troops into the car and stay on task. So the moral being that my life may never be stress-free, I just need to find more ways (like Yoga) to unwind. Because much like the instructor said – I’m grateful to be able to spend my time doing Yoga, I’m grateful that I’m alive and well and I’m especially grateful for the wonderful life I have stressors and all!